June 24, 2018

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Beat The Career Pattern Blues

So How Do You Beat The Career Pattern Blues? Follow These 3 Steps Below.

Do you have a pattern in your career that you can't seem to break? For instance, at your job there are people that don't like you. Or, you are constantly late to meetings. Or, you can't seem to get your reports in on time. Or, promotions or opportunities go to someone else, and not you.

The common denominator in all of these patterns is you. Yes, you may be able to pinpoint a time or situation when something happened to you that was not your fault. We all have that. But if time and time again the same things keep happening to you in your career, then you are the problem.

So How Do You Beat The Career Pattern Blues? Follow These 3 Steps Below.

  1. Acknowledge Your Pattern

    You can't fix what you don't admit, so getting honest with yourself is the first step. Let go of blame and assess your behavior. Why are you repeating the same pattern over and over again? Why can't you stop? Ask yourself these hard questions, and see what answers you come up with. If you can't figure it out on your own, then the pattern is probably caused by something deeper. Ask yourself where you learned this behavior. Did your mom or dad act the same way? Siblings? Other family members? Usually when you have a pattern and you don't know why, it started a long time ago. You learned it from somewhere or someone. Once you acknowledge your behavior, and realize that it was learned and not something you are destined to have in your career forever, you can take steps to change it.

  2. Decide To Break Your Pattern

    This is important. You may not want to change your pattern. Maybe you like being late. Maybe it makes you feel good or gives you control at work. Maybe you don't like being told what to do and that's why you hand in reports when you want to and not when they are due. Maybe you like being unique, and that's why you "say" you don't care what people think about you. You don't have to let go of a pattern if you don't want to. But if you don't, it will continue to haunt you and keep you from being successful in your career. No one can make this decision for you. It has to come from you, not because you should, but because you want to.

  3. Learn New Patterns

Learning comes from many sources; books, classes, or reaching out. You are looking for answers that will take you deep inside yourself; not the fluffy surface stuff. For example, if you regularly hand in reports late, books on time management and planning are good, but books to help you recognize problems with authority figures may be better. If you are passed up for promotions frequently, a class on speaking up may be good, but a workshop that helps you understand why you let people step all over you, may be better. If people don't like you, a conversation with a friend on how you can get along with others may be helpful, but career coaching on why you have to be "unique" and how it rubs people the wrong way may be better. Digging deep will be painful at times; but it will teach you new things. Your new found revelations will be the pathway to better patterns that will transform your career and your life.

So, what do you say? You only have one life to live, so it might as well be a life you love!

- Deborah Brown-Volkman

President, Surpass Your Dreams, Inc.

Deborah Brown-Volkman, PCC, is the President of Surpass Your Dreams, Inc. a successful career, life, and mentor coaching company that works with Senior Executives, Vice Presidents, and Managers who are looking for new career opportunities or seek to become more productive in their current role. She is the author of "Coach Yourself To A New Career", "Don't Blow It! The Right Words For The Right Job" and "How To Feel Great At Work Everyday." Deborah can be reached at or at (631) 874-2877.


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